School’s out, and my kids are ready. They’ve been counting down the days since the beginning of May, keeping a surprisingly accurate count in their heads of how many days are left, total, and of those, how many are school days, and of those, how many are half-days. Who knew they were so good at math?

I can’t decide whether I’m excited or alarmed. On the one hand, it’ll be nice to have a break and get to just hang out with the kids, doing fun summer things—hanging out at the beach, going camping, running through sprinklers.

But of course, nothing’s without its downside—the stresses that end with the close of the school year are often just replaced by a different kind of hassle. In fact, for every summer “pro”, there seems to be a distasteful “con” that taints my end-of-year excitement with a dose of dread. For instance:

PRO: I won’t have to drag the kids out of bed early every morning.
CON: If I ever allow myself the delusion of expecting to sleep in, I’ll just be that much more frustrated when the baby wakes me up at the crack of dawn.

PRO: The joy reflected on the boys’ faces when they realize they have three months ahead of endless fun, little responsibility and much more freedom.
CON: The frustration reflected in my tone when I field the hundredth complaint of “Mom, I’m bored—there’s nothing to dooooo!” and the on-the-edge crack in my voice when I yell “It’s beautiful out! Go outside, already!”

PRO: My three-year-old will be beyond excited to have his brothers around all day.
CON: My three-year-old will throw 18 tantrums a day when his older brothers leave the yard and he can’t follow.

PRO: My kids will be around all the time.
CON: My kids will be around all the time.

When I feel ambivalent like this, I try to imagine a picturesque summer scenario: my entire family lounging around the yard sipping ice-cold lemonade.

In reality, I know it’ll be everybody but me doing the lounging. I’ll probably be running back and forth, filling up their empty glasses and re-applying their sunscreen.

And I’ll be alternating between counting down the days until summer break ends—and wishing I could keep them just like that forever.